1 – Three groups of three

We’ve got to talk to all these people who insist on assigning us IDs with a long line of numbers. Uniformity is needed. Nine digits. That’s it. That way we can read ‘em off in threes (i.e. 554 237 446), which is totally 100 percent normal. We can’t have eight digits. Who plays just eight holes? Nor do we want 10 numbers. Who walks off on the 10thgreen? Nine numbers and nine numbers only.

2 – Play ball

Speaking of making things simple, the world was pretty much in harmony when first base was the curbstone at your neighbor’s driveway, second base was the middle of the long crack in the street, third base was the hydrant, and home plate was your glove.

3 – All together now

Oh, and when the pimple ball went through a hole in the sewer cover, you never saw teamwork come together so quickly. That cover was off in less than a minute.

4 – Yes, they approve

Never have two “hot” players concurred so quickly and enthusiastically that an upcoming major is coming along at a perfect time and on an ideal stage. But Rory McIlroy (four-time winner at the Quail Hollow Club and Justin Thomas (2017 PGA winner at Quail Hollow) are unequivocally OK with the PGA Championship on deck in a few months in Charlotte, N.C.

5 – We’re missing something

It’s a huge mystery to me, this search for a nice yellow golf shirt. Pro shops are swimming in blues, greens, pinks, and whites. But I’m starting to think I will have to take the lead in the Tour de France to slip into a yellow shirt.

6 – Could’ve, would’ve, should’ve

Nothing is a conversation-stopper quite like hearing someone take you back to the third hole and say, “I should have . . . ,” when all you did was ask what he shot.

7 – Just saying . . .

No worries if Rory McIlroy fans want to continue to toast his career Grand Slam-clinching win in the recent Masters. Just remember that McIlroy completed the career Grand Slam in his 63rd major as a professional, then remind yourself of this: Tiger Woods achieved the career Grand Slam in just 15 majors as a pro, Jack Nicklaus in 19. (And let’s not forget that both Tiger and Jack completed the career Grand Slam three times over. It took Tiger 46 starts, Jack 67.)

8 – Which reminds me

Worth remembering, too, that Gene Sarazen had no idea he had become the first to win the career Grand Slam back in 1935. He probably discovered it decades later.

9 – It’s a new experience

How are you spending this first TGL off-season?