When you attempt to wrap your hands around phenomena such as the biennial Ryder Cup, the task is difficult as it can be measured in a multitude of ways.

Start with this: It might be a multi-billion-dollar showcase event now, but the first 25 editions of this biennial affair were secrets to the vast majority of sports fans around the globe. And if you enjoyed the competitive nature of the Ryder Cup from 1927-1983 (the U.S. waltzed its way to a 21-3-1 record) you probably were riveted by the New York Yacht Club’s 25-1 record in the America’s Cup between 1870 and 1980 and enthralled by the Harlem Globetrotters’ 16,000 wins over the Washington Generals.

So overlooked by the sporting public was the Ryder Cup for seven decades that it didn’t land on live TV until 1983 – and even then it was only for the final four holes of Sunday singles. This was 27 years after the Masters became the first golf tournament to be shown live, by the way.

But oh, how things have changed and American loyalists are well aware of how the tide has turned. Casting aside the antiquated Great Britain & Ireland nonsense and adopting their fellow Europeans as mates in 1979 was a game-changer and the numbers are frustrating for those waving the red, white and blue.

Europe is 12-6-1 since 1985, 8-3 since coughing up the 1999 Ryder Cup at The Country Club, and the U.S. has lost seven straight times in seven different European countries (Spain, England, Ireland, Wales, Scotland, France, Italy), including a 50 ½ to 33 ½ disadvantage the last three trips across the pond.

Ah, but the 45th edition of the Ryder Cup will be on friendly American soil (we’re talking New York now; keep “friendly” in perspective) so things will be different, eh? Well, sure, if you’re recalling USA romps in Minnesota (2016) and Wisconsin (2021). But do you need a reminder of the heartache in Rochester, N.Y. (1995), Detroit (2004), and Chicago (2012) to curb any sense of overzealousness on the eve of Bethpage Black (Sept. 26-28)?

Thought so.

Let’s switch gears then and consider the ingredients – some scripted, others offbeat – to what appears to be the Ryder Cup’s perfect formula.

THE INTANGIBLES

Up front, it’s a three-day sprint with three different match-play formats jammed into five sessions with captains and players given little time to breathe and less opportunity to react. Unlike four-day, 72-hole stroke-play events where you are basically alone on an island and have plenty of time to reflect, the pace of a Ryder Cup enables emotions to boil over, which is why we got Rory McIlroy and Joe LaCava going bonkers in Italy two years ago.

ALWAYS, SILLINESS SELLS

Remember, ladies and gentlemen, trained professionals sniff out the stories at Ryder Cups and investigate ad nauseam, even when the news value is miniscule.

For instance, in 2006 Euro golf writers grilled U.S. captain Tom Lehman about what they inferred as a slight against Irish fare when the Ryder Cup was in Dublin. “It was very difficult to find good chips and salsa,” Lehman said about about past trips to Ireland. Thus, his decision to bring corn tortillas with him.

“Did you bring the salsa, too?” was the biting follow-up. “No, we brought the ingredients to make the salsa,” said Lehman.

Riveting.

Four years later, in Wales, the story that for days commanded our attention involved writing the words “hydrostatic tester.” Yes, the rainsuit fiasco. American rainsuits, specifically, and it was suggested that ours were inferior to theirs and thus was the Cup lost by a 14 ½ to 13 ½ margin.

“Call it Water(proof)gate,” wrote Jim Litke of the Associated Press, his humor truly representative of a thought so many of us have at these Ryder Cups. Which is: Why do non-stories become stories at this international gathering?

None was more comical than the one in 2002 when some British reporters were cheesed off that Tiger Woods’ practice routine went from about 6 a.m. to 10 a.m., before the majority of fans arrived.

“For Tiger Woods to slip out of his blanket, to wear his pajamas, to go play a game of golf without the rest of the world seeing him, I don’t think that’s fair,” seethed one scribe.

My memory is, at hearing “wear his pajamas” some of us fell out of our seats laughing, but U.S. captain Curtis Strange responded calmly and beautifully: “Are you asking a question or making a comment?”

RYDER CUP QUOTES ARE JUST BETTER

A personal top five after a tour of duty at nine Ryder Cups.

5. “You’ve gotta do what you’ve gotta do.” – Anthony Kim with total nonchalance to Sergio Garcia, who tried to explain why he deserved a free lift several holes into their singles match. It was 2008 at Valhalla, the brash and cocky Kim was boat-racing the Spaniard and could have cared less about stopping to see his foe’s dilemma.

4. “We have actually revised the (European) qualification for next time. It’s nine spots, two picks, and Poults.” – Lee Westwood at the winning team’s press conference in 2012 in Medinah. He nodded to a few seats away, toward a beaming Ian Poulter who had authored a most unforgettable performance in going 4-0, the highlight being his five straight birdies alongside Rory McIlroy to beat Jason Dufner and Zach Johnson in a four-ball match late Saturday.

3. “Oh, I’m sorry you’re taking it that way. I don’t understand why you would take it that way.” – Phil Mickelson at the 2014 post-tournament interview, when a reporter suggested with great accuracy that the lefthander had just thrown captain Tom Watson under the bus (“a brutal destruction,” the reporter said) following a third straight defeat.

2. “(They) might shoot 58 – if it gets that far.” – U.S. captain Hal Sutton, showing extreme faith in his decision to pair Tiger Woods and Phil Mickelson in the opening four-ball match in 2004.

1. “Like I said the first day, man, you go with what’s in your pants.” – Nicolas Colsaerts, aka “The Dude” at that Medinah press conference. In his one winning match that year, the Belgian lit it up alongside Westwood to beat Tiger Woods and Steve Stricker.

UNEXPLAINED MYSTERIES

While we live in age when sports writers react to today, forget yesterday, and don’t know that yesteryear existed, Keegan Bradley will be all over social media today, thanks to the naming of his six captain’s picks, likely one of them being himself.

When you're a start-up, as the Ryder Cup was in 1927, the owners and operators have to take on extra responsibilities. So the iconic Walter Hagen not only captained the USA team, he played, and he wrote the game story for the wire services. Just don't ask Keegan Bradley to replicate such a task.

Samuel Ryder, a wealthy seed merchant in England, told a sportswriter in 1926 that he was “deeply concerned at the continuous success of Americans in the Open Championship here.” Guess he meant three wins by two different Americans in 54 years – Jock Hutchinson in 1921 and Walter Hagen in ’22 and ’24, though maybe he envisioned Bobby Jones’ arrival.

Abe Mitchell, a professional who was Ryder’s personal golf coach, tossed down the gauntlet of sorts later in 1926 and put together a team of English pros for what they informally called the Samuel Ryder Cup. They drummed Hagen’s team that included Tommy Armour, Jim Barnes, and Fred McLeod. Because they were all born in Europe, those three couldn’t play a year later when the first Ryder Cup was played at Worcester CC 98 years ago.

“Greatest Army of Golfers Ever Assembled,” screamed the Pittsburgh Press headline after Hagen and eight others (Gene Sarazen, Johnny Farrell, Leo Diegel, Joe Turnesa, Johnny Golden, Al Espinosa, Bill Mehlhorn and Al Watrous) romped over the GB&I team in the first official Ryder Cup.

The triumphs kept coming and coming, at least for 56 years until a team of European golfers started to pour the foundation of a dynasty of sorts.

Should you want to comprehend how Tiger Woods, the greatest player of his generation, played in eight Ryder Cups and was on one winning team, have at it.

But at the same time, explain how on Sunday singles in 2002 with the Ryder Cup on the line, No. 2 in the world (Mickelson) gagged against No. 119 (Phillip Price), No. 7 (Davis Love III) couldn’t beat No. 88 (Pierre Fulke), and Paul Azinger could only halve with Niclas Fasth.

It prompts you to consider that while Team USA constantly built around Woods, Mickelson, Love and world-ranking might, the Euros found ways to win with unheralded names such as Manuel Pinero, Christy O’Connor Jr., Costantino Rocca, Victor Dubuisson, and the intriguing Colsaerts.

Maybe Bradley rekindling thoughts of a revered Ryder Cupper in Arnold Palmer (the last player-captain, in 1963) will do the trick. But here’s one way that Bradley will not match the performance of player-captain Walter Hagen in 1927: The Haig not only went 2-0 and led a dominating win over GBI (9 ½ to 2 ½) but he probably poured himself a nightcap and penned the game story for newspapers throughout the land.

Try that, Captain Keegan.

Then again, don’t. You’ve got enough on your plate, young man.

1 – Noise-makers?

So, if influencers don’t really influence, what are they?

2 – Meet the immoveable force, Theo

Taking a wild guess here, but when he meets with Patrick Cantlay to discuss a shot clock and speeding up the game, something will occur to Theo Epstein. That is, winning the World Series with the Red Sox and Cubs were walks in the park compared to this Cantlay character.

3 – When the finish was tougher

Call me old-fashioned, but the finishing stretch (what is now the par-4 seventh, par-4 eighth, and par-3 ninth) before they flipped the nines at East Lake was a bigger gut-check than what we now have. As it now is, after the tee shot on the par-3 15th, there’s really not a shot coming home that creates angst.

4 – Road show will be welcomed

Then again, who cares because the PGA Tour officials are likely going to take the Tour Championship on the road. About time, too.

GOLF COURSE SIGNS – OK, so it’s not really a sign, as much as it’s a signal. The signal being beware of “penalty area.” But at The Bel (aka Boscobel Golf Club), a muni that Clemson sometimes plays at, the red stakes are not conventional; they are old limbs from trees. Thanks to PGA of America legend and good friend Steve Napoli, now the golf coach at Holy Cross.

5 – My mind is made up

I hold these truths to be self-evident: Ben Hogan’s aura is unmatched and no one wore plaid polyester like Johnny Miller.

6 – You want it, then make it

If an opponent walks slowly to his ball and glares at you, then asks, “is this good?” the proper response is: “I’m not sure, putt it and we’ll find out.”

7 – Overkill on that sign

There needs to be a petition that we can sign to put a stop to any more photos of that sign at Bethpage Black warning golfers not to play it unless they’re highly skilled. We’ve been looking at photos of that sign for 20-plus years and enough is enough.

8 – It was good enough for a King . . .

Back it up to the topic of fashion in golf for a minute. Cardigan sweaters need to make a big comeback.

9 – Such nonsense

A golfer saying he or she “has been working hard” on their games remains the clearest signal to stop taking notes.